—  Best to kill the dragon before it devours the sheep  —

Within the dynamic structure of mutuality, there lurks an enemy.  Lurking, creeping, waiting patiently to strike, there is an enemy to mutuality.  It can sneak up on us before we know it.  If we know what it looks like, it’s consequences, and are prepared to resist it, then we can stand united against it.

          It’s name is Jealously and it’s super nasty.

It might look like this:

  • During a flourishing ministry-season of a friend or partner, one may be tempted to find every fault in them, name it and talk about it with 85 of your closest friends.
  • “Oh my gosh, she _______ better than I do. crap. I think I hate her.”
  • Instead of celebrating God-given gifts we see in others, we ignore them, try to duplicate them or generally disdain them.
  • Jealously squeezes out the room in our hearts for truth and love.
  • “Don’t even talk to me about mentoring others…who has time…I’ve got some stuff I’ve gotta go do…”
  • If another man or woman has what I admire, I assume they are probably not the right person for the job…I am…”I can serve those people better.”


Jealously seldom travels alone.  You always find the Dragon of Distraction close behind.

  • Distraction yields less love.
  • Distraction divides and conquers.
  • Distraction leads to self-reliance.
  • Distraction leads to away from God.

“Jealously is the worst of all faults because it makes a victim of both parties.”  –Jean Tierney

How do you combat these dragons?

  • Guard your heart in Christ Jesus.
  • You were called to peace.
  • Celebrate the treasures of Christ in one another.
  • Publicly and privately encourage one another in Christ Jesus.
  • Make room for others to shine, speak, give.
  • Quick to Listen. Slow to Speak.
  • Regularly remind yourself that you are made from dust and will return to it one day.
  • Even if you are wronged, misunderstood, judged harshly, manipulated….love again.
  • Getting rid of jealousy ALWAYS involves calling on the Name of the Lord for help.

Join the lovely conversation about mutuality on this blog:   Rachel Held Evans


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